OK...well I did make it out yesterday, but only for a 30 minute bike ride on the stationary bike and then a 7 minute run on the treadmill. About 1/3rd of what I was supposed to do according to my coach and training plan. OMG...my leg muscles were so stiff...it hurt just to walk. BUT as always, even though there was muscle and joint pains after, I felt better. One for having done something/anything and two for pushing myself...even if only a third of where I was supposed to be.
Having had that experience yesterday, I would have thought that today I would have a better attitude. But when I woke up and saw the snow falling down in heavier and heavier loads...I secretly prayed that my 12-noon swim coaching session would get cancelled. BUT IT DIDN'T. So I hauled my fat (post holiday) ass up to the training centre and got in the endless pool and for an hour, I ground it out.
Interestingly, in the first third, I kept thinking: "I hate this. I am quitting. I don't like swimming. I am no good. It hurts. I'm lousy...etc." I know...I know...not great self-talk, but I was already in the pool and trying. So I was indulging these self-defeating/self-deprecating inner thoughts. But by the 2nd third and especially by the final third, I started to feel better about myself and my swimming. My breathing -- the one thing I am having the hardest time with -- started (just started) to get better. I started developing a rhythm and cadence to my breathing and eventually my strokes even started to improve. In fact, the more comfortable I got, and the slower/easier I took it and the less I thought about it: the better I got.
And, by the end, I was actually starting to enjoy it and I wasn't even tired! :)
My coach had lots of tips/corrections/suggestions for me...and also several compliments. He felt like I had made amazing progress over the course of our five sessions so far...in particular with my breathing. And I am JUST starting to believe that I might be able to do this.
It's funny...I had been carrying on an inner-self-coaching dialogue since I had started this whole undertaking. I have been telling myself to be patient. That I will improve over time. To not be so self-critical...but it is one thing to think it abstractly and while not working out. But to actually fulfill on it "in the moment" and really carry it through is an altogether different experience and skill. Nonetheless...I am making progress however little and/or slowly.
PROGRESS....NOT PERFECTION!
(Side note: I was also supposed to run at least 50-minutes today and I do not see that happening. Tomorrow is supposed to be my Day Off...but we will see.)
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